Johnny Refund's Crypt

1. NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD

2006-10-31T00:00:00.000-05:00

1. NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD
(1968)
Directed by George Romero

Well, here it is, my favorite scary movie, “Night of the Living Dead”. I’ve been singing the praises of so many movies that my pipes are sore, the hour is late and the candle is guttering to die. But let me just say, while there is time, that this low budget indie is thee perfect horror movie. The acting is decidedly above the B-movie level, especially the performance of Duane Jones as Ben, the writing is intelligent and the downbeat ending of meat hooks and burning corpses is hard to top for sheer gooseflesh effect. As is evidenced by entries up and down this list, you don’t need a lot of money or big time stars to make a great horror movie. It’s been argued that horror is actually quite conservative (if you act out of line then you will be punished so keep to the straight and narrow, etc.) but I think the best horror is disturbing because it is subversive. It’s a genre perfect for expressing the unspeakable. Because of this, masterworks like “Night of the Living Dead” will continue to bubble up from the underground as the years roll by, no matter how hard the squares try to suppress their rising. So Ben survives the night long assault of the flesh eating dead only to be mistaken for one of the zombies and shot in the forehead. The zombies by daylight look lost and pathetic as they stagger around and the real dangerous monsters, the kill crazy mob of gun toting cops and armed citizens, are revealed. Horror can be addictive because of it’s thrills but it’s certainly not without it’s lessons. On that note I should stop typing and try to get some sleep. Maybe in slumberland I’ll navigate through some old dark houses and sip wine with the ghost of Carol Borland. I hope you have pleasant dreams as well and, in the words of Sir Graves Ghastly, I wish you all “Happy Haunting!” and good night.

2. ERASERHEAD

2006-10-30T00:00:00.000-05:00

2. ERASERHEAD
(1976)
Directed by David Lynch

Horror by definition is not a pleasant thing. It is, after all, the polar opposite of attraction and contentment. Having a gun held to your head in a robbery or being helpless and menaced in any way is undoubtedly horrific. Witnessing something monstrous and inhuman (providing of course that you yourself are not monstrous and inhuman) will also summon the horror response. It's an uncomfortable and panicked state of mind marked by repulsion, dread and fear that even most thrill seekers only enjoy in mediated doses. Horror in cinema, because it is most commonly intended as entertainment, is usually packaged with other elements and ingredients so the experience isn't too disagreeable. David Lynch apparently wasn't terribly concerned with the comfort level of his audience when he created his first feature length effort "Eraserhead" and, as a result, gave us a piece of true unfiltered horror. Capturing on film the weird nightmares that fester in the subconscious is a talent that he is famous for and none of his films are weirder or more purely nightmarish than this one. My favorite bits of his other films ("Wild at Heart" (1990), "Fire Walk With Me" (1992) and "Mulholland Drive" (2001) especially) are always the surreal episodes that take the viewer through the looking glass and into bizarre and unpredictable interior worlds. Unfettered by reality he can summon up moments of real beauty but just as easily (and probably more often) he summons screeching terror. In "Eraserhead" there is no trip through the looking glass. We are on the other side as soon as the film starts rolling and we are there until the bitter end. The lady in the radiator, the bundled infant creature, the depressing and unrelenting atmosphere filled with industrial whistles and clanks, the howling winds. A fantastic and grossly symbolic take on the horrors of parenthood? Could be. A good movie for lonely people to watch on Valentine's Day? Most definitely.

3. FREAKS

2006-10-29T00:00:00.000-04:00

3. FREAKS
(1932)
Directed by Tod Browning

Tod Browning had worked sideshows and circuses as a young man and had carny running in his veins. His collaborations with Lon Chaney in a string of great films in the 1920's had common threads of deformity and vengeance running through them and "Freaks", a culmination of these obsessive themes and influences, was the film he was born to create. He was riding high on the big success of Universal's "Dracula"(1931) and when MGM landed him to do this film they gave him full creative control only to be completely shocked and dismayed by the results. This really is a true historical document that offers the viewer a glimpse into the bygone days of the old time freak shows. The cast includes real life pinheads, a Siamese twin, a bearded lady, the living torso (no arms, no legs), Johnny Eck the half-boy (nothing below the ribcage), the half-man, half-woman Josephine Joseph, and other usual big top denizens like the strong man, clowns, midgets and dwarves. Some of the so-called normal people have good hearts, namely the charming love struck couple of Phroso the Clown and Venus the seal trainer, but they are mirrored by the sinister couple of Cleopatra (Olga Bacalnova) and her lover the strong man. Cleo finds out that the midget Hans (Harry Earles, who also played the cigar smoking imposter baby in Browning's brilliant "The Unholy Three"(1930)) is due to inherit a fortune and she goes about playing him like a fiddle to get him married with the intention of poisoning him once under matrimonial control. Anyone who has ever felt abnormal or strange or unwanted is likely to get their heart strings tugged hard by this movie but Cleo and the strong man have underestimated the freaks and in the stormy climax they exact their vengeance in horrific fashion. Rarely has revenge been so sweet. Sadly, Browning's career didn't recover from the ensuing backlash of this film, but it's hard to imagine how he could've topped it anyway.

4. THE EXORCIST

2006-10-28T00:00:00.000-04:00

4. THE EXORCIST
(1973)
Directed by William Friedkin

There are many advantages to being born and raised Catholic. I am a product of Catholic schools and in Catholicism I found many things to be perversely exciting- the bloody martyrs, the shadowy confessional booths, the glowing rows of dedication candles, the thunderous pipe organs, the bitter sexless nuns, the burning threat of Hell, the delicious guilt for all things pleasurable and the very real threat of demonic possession are just a few that come to mind. Yes, "The Exorcist" scared the shit out of me when I first saw it on the sly as a youngster. Driven to heighten my terror I bought a used copy of the novel by William Peter Blatty and I've read that same copy cover to cover at least half a dozen times over the years, trying to isolate and understand the serious case of the creeps that this little tale still summons in me. I think the fears that it taps into are pretty primal and experts say they even have an effect on non-Catholics. After all, few things are more terrifying than losing identity, control and being dragged post haste towards death in the meantime. There are a lot of invasive forces that can take over our bodies and forever alter our personalities and they are all scary. This movie provides us with a visceral representation of such an invasion but I think the most effective section of the film is the slowly evolving suspense driven first half before little Regan's head creaks around and she's tied to the bedposts. A word to the wise- don't mess with Pazuzu.

5. DEMENTIA

2006-10-27T00:00:00.000-04:00

5. DEMENTIA
(1955)
Directed by John Parker

The 1950's, a decade where a long list of cool exploits and advances rumbled this square planet, was a period that was surprisingly lean on truly great horror flicks. Sure, there was no shortage of creature features and B-movie lunacies to be had at the local drive-in that undeniably have their charms, but seriously troubling and inventive flicks were hard to find. Here's one worth digging up. Singular, shadowy, unsettling, bizarre- "Dementia" is a surreal low budget bit of genius that unfolds on a hallucinatory noir dreamscape complete with deserted late night city streets of blowing trash, a graveyard and a smoky bohemian jazz club. The movie follows a troubled young woman as she wanders a weird night filled with madness, blood and ghosts. It's safe to say that there is no other movie quite like this one. Originally shot in 1953 it's easy to see why this little slice of black and white nightmare had distribution problems what with it's unrelenting mood of revulsion and sexual menace, not to mention one memorably manic dismemberment scene. "Dementia" was re-released as "Daughter of Horror" with an oddball voiceover but watching the "silent" version is recommended. We are very lucky that this morbid little pearl has survived and is still available. Get decked out in black, indulge in your choice of poison and get looped by this weirdness. Crazy, man, crazy.

6. THE OLD DARK HOUSE

2006-10-26T00:00:00.000-04:00

6. THE OLD DARK HOUSE
(1932)
Directed by James Whale

The roads in Wales are washed out due to torrential rains and five travelers are forced to seek shelter in the isolated manor of the Femm family. The Femm family is a strange crew. We have three eccentric siblings, their bed-ridden 102 year old father and a horribly scarred mumbling butler who goes ballistic when he hits the sauce. These ten characters are forced to deal with each other during one inclement evening and the result is the greatest of all old dark house thrillers, appropriately titled "The Old Dark House". The cast, comprised of mostly British actors who cut their teeth in the theatre, is a rare delight. The three eccentric siblings are played by Ernest Thesiger (gloriously gay head of the house), Eva Moore (his creepy death obsessed sister) and Brember Wills (their cackling pyromaniac little brother who is usually kept locked in his room away from fire). The menacing butler is brought to monosyllabic life by Boris Karloff fresh from his performance as Frankenstein's monster, and the travelers are played by the dashing Melvyn Douglas, the jolly rotund Charles Laughton, the adorable brunette Lillian Bond, the elegant blonde Gloria Stuart (who would also appear in "The Invisible Man" opposite Claude Reins) and her brave husband Raymond Massey. This is easily my favorite cast out of any horror movie. The script (adapted from the J.B. Priestly novel "Benighted") is air tight and James Whale works his usual visual magic, improving upon some of the moody elements Paul Leni employed in the 1927 version of "The Cat and the Canary". This is my favorite of all the Universal classics. Hands severed. Hands down.

7. NOSFERATU, THE VAMPYRE

2006-10-25T00:00:00.000-04:00

7. NOSFERATU, THE VAMPYRE
(1979)
Directed by Werner Herzog

Much has been made of the creative partnership between Werner Herzog and notorious crackpot Klaus Kinski and the two teamed up to create some compelling films (i.e. "Fitzcarraldo" (1982) and "Aguirre, Wrath of God"(1972)) but "Nosferatu, the Vampyre" is their finest moment and, in my not so humble estimation, the best vampire movie ever made. I'd also proclaim it the most beautiful horror movie ever. It certainly doesn't hurt that the template was the Murnau classic from 1921 (which Herzog considered the most important movie ever made in Germany). It also doesn't hurt that the screen is graced not only by Kinski as the bald corpse colored monster but by the pale beauty of Isabelle Adjani as well who, throughout her career, has shown a certain flair for portraying madness ("Camille Claudel"(1988), "The Story of Adele H"(1975) and the bizarre "Possession"(1981) are three fine examples). Her movements are slow, elegant and haunting and these adjectives are also appropriate when describing the movie as a whole. A sequence that exemplifies this mood finds the character of Jonathan Harker (Bruno Ganz) traveling on foot to the castle of Dracula as the day wanes and night falls. Accompanied by the gorgeous music of Wagner from "Das Reingold" we watch darkening clouds roll over mountain peaks until the sun is gone. Herzog has a penchant for lingering on evocative landscapes but here the effect feels like one long delicious shiver. He is taking us into the land of phantoms, shadows and plague. It's mesmerizing if you are susceptible to such spells.

8. SUSPIRIA

2006-10-24T00:00:00.000-04:00

8. SUSPIRIA
(1977)
Directed by Dario Argento

You can make at least three lofty claims about this one: it's the crown jewel of Italian horror, it's the best damn witchcraft movie ever made, and it's blessed with the most effective horror soundtrack of all time (courtesy of Goblin). There are so many elements successfully coming together here that it's still an overwhelming experience (especially in full stereo with the volume cranked). Director Dario Argento began his career by turning out some provocative dark thrillers but soon followed his calling down a bloodier path with 1975's "Deep Red". Two years later he unleashed "Suspiria", a full blown tale of supernatural horror that plays out like a candy colored nightmare. Literary influences for this masterwork include Lewis Carrol's "Alice in Wonderland" and "Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs". Originally the script called for much younger girls to play the main roles and, although this was changed, the film retains the feeling of a child's nightmare. Argento employs little tricks to heighten this atmosphere like placing doorknobs higher so that the adult characters have to reach up, like a child, to open a door, and by keeping much of the dialogue intended to be delivered by younger actresses intact. The results, however, are anything but childlike. Jessica Harper plays the ballerina under duress who comes to an elite dancing academy in Germany. The night of her arrival there is a rainstorm and a grisly double murder. Her curiosity about the crime leads her to the discovery that this prestigious school of dance is run by a coven of witches who do not take kindly to meddling young Americans. Truly a work of bloody high art.

9. HALLOWEEN

2006-10-23T00:00:00.000-04:00

9. HALLOWEEN
(1978)
Directed by John Carpenter

October is my favorite month of the year because it culminates in that glorious celebration of masquerade, inversion and all things dark known as Halloween. This festive holiday predates motion pictures but, oddly enough, it was never used as a prominent backdrop for any of the celebrated black and white horror movies (although it was used in some entertaining shorts like "Betty Boop's Halloween Party"). The obvious cinematic appeal of flickering jack 'o lanterns and blowing leaves wasn't capitalized on until much later and, by the time it was, the result was anything but a treat for little kids. The autumnal ritual that finds many folks playfully carving pumpkins was now the territory of a masked psycho who carved people. Sure, there were some precursors to the much maligned slasher film genre before 1978 (films like "Twitch of the Death Nerve"(1971) and "Black Christmas"(1974)) but none were as masterful or as frightening as John Carpenter's little indie called "Halloween". This one wrote the book. Of course it's been ripped off so many goddamn times that it's hard for folks to step back and appreciate it as the remarkably original film that it is and yes, it's unfortunate that it spawned a legion of copy cat garbage films of the slice and dice variety but that doesn't diminish it's power. Forget the copy cats, forget the sequels (please) but don't forget the original.

10. THE BLACK CAT

2006-10-22T00:00:00.000-04:00

10. THE BLACK CAT
(1934)
Directed by Edgar G. Ulmer

The First World War left Europe deeply scarred and it's reverberations could still be felt fifteen years afterwards in 1934 with movies like "The Black Cat". The story involves an architect named Hjalmar Poelzig (Boris Karloff) whose flawed leadership in the war lead to the slaughter of thousands. After the war, instead of running from the scene of his atrocity, he uses his architectural skills to build a massive house in the Bauhaus style directly over the spot. Embracing the role of villain and reveling in morbidity, Poelzig has devoted himself to the black arts and keeps his dead wife on the premises in a glass coffin. One day this evil fucker gets a visit from one of his old comrades, Dr. Vitus Werdegast (Bela Lugosi). Dr. Vitus has just spent fifteen years in the soul crushing hell of a Russian prison because of Poelzig and is making a friendly visit to clear a few things up. As you might surmise, revenge is on the menu and violence is inevitable. For the record, Lugosi was a veteran of the war himself and was wounded three times before his fighting days were over. Legend has it that he could really creep a person out with his ghastly war stories. Maybe this is why his performance in "The Black Cat" is so gripping. By the way, it should be noted that "The Black Cat" bears no resemblance to the Edgar Allan Poe story of the same name that it's supposedly based on but that is of little consequence. Poe certainly would've approved of the dread and sadism on display here. This is essential viewing for all monster kids.

11. BLUE VELVET

2006-10-21T00:00:00.000-04:00

11. BLUE VELVET
(1986)
Directed by David Lynch

As far as monsters go, I'd rather fend off a posse of flesh eating zombies than go on a joy ride with Frank Booth. I caught this on cable television when I was still in high school after a long night of imbibing in various spirits with my delinquent friends and I had absolutely no idea what I was in for. The folks were asleep and I camped out on the couch. I was lucky enough to catch the movie right at the beginning and the Bobby Vinton song drew me in. The next thing I knew there was an ear crawling with ants and psychopath Frank Booth (Dennis Hopper in his greatest role) sucking down nitrus oxide and doing scissor tricks. I was horrified and changed for life. I think this baby had the same revelatory effect on a lot of folks. Lynch has an uncanny ability to create images of haunting beauty before suddenly shifting the focus into some new unpredictable darkness. A brief illustration of this occurs when the tormented nightclub singer Dorothy (played by Isabella Rossellini) is singing the title song bathed in lush blue light in front of a jazz combo backed by Argento red drapes. The melody is wistful but soothing and then the song fails and morphs into a dark and ominous orchestration (composed by long time Lynch collaborator Angelo Badalamenti) that accompanies footage of our two main characters driving along in the night. Trouble and violence are never far away. Danger is lurking nearby. Heineken? Fuck that shit...

12. THE BRIDE OF FRANKENSTEIN

2006-10-20T00:00:00.000-04:00

12. THE BRIDE OF FRANKENSTEIN
(1935)
Directed by James Whale

Generally regarded as the greatest of the Universal horror films of the 1930's, "Bride of Frankenstein" certainly had the full support of the studio, giving director James Whale considerably more lavish resources than he had at his disposal when filming the 1931 original. Because of the extra piles of cash and a remarkable level of artistic freedom, Whale's visual ideas were developed brilliantly. Amazing gothic sets, gorgeous black and white photography, some choice gallows humor and Karloff's heart-wrenching portrayal of the monster serve as the main support beams in this films hallowed status. But Karloff's isn't the only command performance here. Special accolades should be heaped on Ernest Thesiger, cast in the role of Dr. Pretorius, who seduces Dr. Frankenstein back into experimenting with creating life out of dead tissue, this time to assemble a woman. Thesiger is delightfully twisted, evil and flamboyantly queer, adding a new dimension to his "seduction" of Frankenstein, who is once again portrayed by Colin Clive. Sadly, Clive copped his eternal nod two years after the filming of this movie due to the ravages of alcohol. This was quite a send off. Another important factor in this movie's overall impact is the wonderful score by Franz Waxman, especially the lilting high strings and harp melody that serves as the theme for the Bride herself, summoned to life in bandages and a wild shock of lightning bolt hair in the form of actress Elsa Lanchester. It's such a sad and powerful moment when the monster lets a big tear stream down his face as she hisses in repulsion at him. Then he pulls the lever that blows the whole castle works sky high. "She hate me", he has realized and I heave a heavy sigh before carrying on.

13. HAXAN: WITCHCRAFT THROUGH THE AGES

2006-10-19T00:00:00.000-04:00

13. HAXAN: WITCHCRAFT THROUGH THE AGES
(1922)
Directed by Benjamin Christensen

This is the kind of history lesson that would've made college more interesting. The movie starts off in a purely educational vein with a twelve minute slideshow of various representations of witches and demons from ancient art to medieval woodcuts accompanied by commentary. The skeptical tone of this commentary leads the viewer to believe that they are in store for a scientific debunking of superstitions regarding sorcery but what emerges instead is true cinematic black magic with director Benjamin Christensen bringing to life the strange old depictions of the supernatural used in his recurring slideshows. The 15th Century skits are given a heightened sense of realism by the sheer ugliness of the actors and no one with a phobia of bad teeth should watch this movie. For those of you who aren't particularly bothered by that sort of thing, a treasure of silent cinema awaits. We have grave robbing, evil witches making brews with severed hands and toads, re-enactments of Inquisition trials and torture (including a helpful section explaining torture devices using the old slideshow routine), broomstick flights over a medieval town, scenes from a witches sabbath that include witches kissing the devil on the ass, sacrificing babies and dancing on a crucifix, and a convent full of lunatic nuns letting loose all of their repressed energies and blaming it on Satan. One of the images that still rattles in my brainpan shows a woman getting her naked back rubbed down with an ointment while straddling a broom as the draped skeleton of a horse meanders by. This esteemed effort officially and forevermore attained cult status when re-released in 1966 with William S. Burroughs providing a voice-over in his wonderful junky drawl.

14. FAUST

2006-10-18T00:00:00.000-04:00

14. FAUST
(1926)
Directed by F.W. Murnau

Watching great silent movies is an uncommon delight that transports the willing viewer into the flickering spell of another world and the trip is especially worthwhile when a genius like Murnau is at the helm. Murnau directed four of the most respected and revered films of the silent era, "Nosferatu"(1921), "The Last Laugh"(1924), "Sunrise"(1927), and the rich visual feast known as "Faust". "Faust" was based on the play of the same name by Goethe and tells the old story of a man signing his soul away to the devil to gain access to worldly powers. This fable is a minor obsession with me. I've even made a couple disastrous attempts to pen my own artistic interpretation but I can take comfort in knowing that I am not alone in this pursuit. It's been given various literary treatments, inspired Classical composers (the Berlioz opera "Le Damnation de Faust" and the Liszt symphonic poem "Mephisto Waltz" being two famous examples) and has been committed to film in a variety of ways. I've never seen a version that comes close to this overlooked treasure from 1926. Working with a hefty budget, Murnau called forth the supernatural in real necromancer fashion. He knew how to cast a spell and he also knew how to cast a role. Employing the considerable talents of the legendary Emil Jennings to play the Devil was a stroke of genius. Although Jennings brings a fair amount of impish playfulness to the part there are some truly creepy moments, especially when he is initially summoned by Faust and shows up grinning with eyes aglow. A noteworthy bonus is the lovely Camilla Horn cast in the role of Gretchen and it always tears me up to see her tied to the stake and going up in flames. "As Thou art called by thy unholy name- Mephisto appear!"

15. ROSEMARY'S BABY

2006-10-17T00:00:00.000-04:00

15. ROSEMARY'S BABY
(1968)
Directed by Roman Polanski

In the 1960's there was a lot of drug taking and spiritual questing going on. Rejecting established conventions was the trend and a new breed of kooks were forgoing trips to their barbers in order to buy up books on Eastern mysticism and self discovery and shit like that. It was inevitable that all of this soul searching would churn up darker waters and while a famous headline proclaimed that God was dead, the Devil was enjoying quite a comeback. "Rosemary's Baby" was a movie that had perfect timing. Exploitation legend and king of gimmicks William Castle owned the rights to the novel penned by Ira Levin and originally planned on filming the story himself. Now I'd be the first to sing the praises of William Castle but I think it was a good thing that an enthusiastic Roman Polanski persuaded him to hand the project over. Polanski was so enthusiastic that he personally wrote the screenplay, following the novel note by note. The story is about a woman (played in the movie by Mia Farrow) who is chosen by a coven of witches to bear the child of Satan. Poor Rosemary is desperately trying to figure out what the hell is happening to her body and quickly running out of time as her pregnancy advances. It's intelligent, beautifully filmed and graced with a wonderfully surreal dream sequence. Ruth Gordon (who also starred in that other fave of the morbidly minded "Harold and Maude") ended up getting the Oscar for her supporting role as the busy body devil worshipping neighbor. Witches, all of them.

16. DR. JEKYLL AND MR. HYDE

2006-10-16T00:00:00.000-04:00

16. DR. JEKYLL AND MR. HYDE
(1931)
Directed by Rouben Mamoulian

1931 was quite a year for horror films. Universal Studios inaugurated their parade of classics that year with "Dracula" and "Frankenstein" and Paramount Studios made the quick decision to hop on the terror train by adapting Robert Louis Stevenson's "The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde". It had been given the silent treatment eleven times, most memorably with John Barrymore in the lead role, but this 1931 version is hands down the best. I'll assume that those of you bothering to read this list already know the basic turns of the tale but let me remind you that when Dr. Jekyll gulps down his chemical concoction he doesn't create Mr. Hyde because Mr. Hyde was always there. He emerges as the hairy and lecherous representation of all those horny and sadistic desires that the good doctor has been trying to suppress. The good doctor, engaged to marry a respectable Victorian lady, had eyes for the prostitute Ivy before that potion went down the pipes. Such repression of desires can clearly have more disastrous effects than a bout of ye olde blue balls. If you bottle up those feelings and let the pressure build for too long there will very likely be a dangerous explosion. Mr. Hyde, when he finally emerges, gleefully says "Free! Free at last!" and off he goes with top hat and cane beneath the foggy gaslights of London to indulge in an assortment of despicable acts, climaxing in the sexualized murder of Ivy. Fredric March steals the show as Mr. Split Personality and actually won the Academy Award that year for best actor. He deserved it. He is absolutely fucking crazed, impossible to reason with, rocketing towards perdition and beware, friends, because studies have shown that the same could happen to you!

17. THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE

2006-10-15T00:00:00.000-04:00

17. THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE
(1974)
Directed by Tobe Hooper

If you've ever been through certain stretches of Texas then you know that this sort of thing could very likely be going on and this spine tingling likelihood gives "Texas Chainsaw" much of it's power. From the self mutilating hitcher to the screaming bloody end this is the gut churning and drugged out face of horror post Spahn Ranch. The gory springboard for the story was the account of Wisconsin farmer Ed Gein who robbed graves for women's bodies which he eviscerated, skinned and dismembered. His secluded snow covered farmhouse was decorated with these parts when authorities finally crashed his sick party in 1957. Switch the scene to dusty hot Texas in the early 1970's and exchange the single madman for an entire family of ghouls and presto, one of the most unsettling bits of cinema is born. The movie starts with a series of blinding flashbulbs that reveal recently uncovered corpses for a blinking moment before fading to black. This sequence, along with many others, still gives me chills. There's no denying that much of the movie is nauseating but goddamn is it powerful. Like rubbernecking a twisted wreck on the highway it makes you feel like a sick fuck afterwards but that morbid pull to reckon bloody death is mighty hard to resist. Oddly enough, one of the images that has always haunted me the most is the shot of a full grown chicken stuck and flapping in the claustrophobic confines of a conventional birdcage. It's an emblem of cruelty that promises pain for any living thing that ventures into this section of Lone Star Hell. Fucked up and visceral and one of the few things scarier than the Butthole Surfers live in their heyday. Watch this one in the heat of Summer with cheap beer and the doors locked.

18. SPIDER BABY

2006-10-14T00:00:00.000-04:00

18. SPIDER BABY
(1964)
Directed by Jack Hill

Filmed in 1964 but not officially released until 1968, "Spider Baby" suffered many indignations on it's way to reaching it's well deserved cult status, including inappropriate new titles such as "The Liver Eaters" and "Cannibal Orgy". For awhile it was thought lost but it has survived and is a morbid little treat from beginning to end. Speaking of beginnings, Lon Chaney Jr. warbles the opening theme song which is a lyrical hodgepodge of the horrific with fine rhymes like "Cannibal spiders creep and crawl, and boys and ghouls are having a ball, Frankenstein, Dracula and even the Mummy, are sure to wind up in somebody's tummy". Fucking poetry! Chaney also stars in the movie, caught on celluloid in the twilight of his life, ravaged by alcoholism but still able to manage what may be his best performance ever as the chauffer left in charge of the ailing members of the cursed Merrye family. There are five members of the family left for him to look after in their ancestral old dark house: the largely unseen Uncle Ned and Aunt Martha who reside in the basement and three charmingly demented children- siblings Virginia, Elizabeth and Ralph. Virginia (played by 17 year old Jill Banner) is the character the film is named after who imagines herself to be a spider, eating bugs and "stinging" her human prey with kitchen knives. Hers is one of my favorite horror performances ever and it's hard for me to pay attention to any of the other actors when she is onscreen. Compelling would be the word. Sid Haig, who plays her brother Ralph, also delivers the goods as the murderous drooling man child. When distant relatives come to stake their claim on the Merrye family fortune bad things happen to people who deserve it and those are just the kind of thrills I dig the most.

19. THE INVISIBLE MAN

2006-10-13T00:00:00.000-04:00

19. THE INVISIBLE MAN
(1933)
Directed by James Whale

Bringing this H.G. Wells narrative to life took some ingenious special effects and the end result was a milestone of inventive photographic trickery. Universal Studios was creating one ghastly success after another by 1933, but "The Invisible Man" may be the most clever and innovative. In addition to the still impressive camera magic employed to make the man vanish beneath his duds, viewers were also treated to a monumental acting performance. Now, I'm sure you've noticed that there is quite a rogues gallery of mentally unsound characters to be found in the history of horror cinema. There is no shortage of bug-eyed stares, unhinged cackles and psychotic wig outs. This is, after all, a genre well suited for depictions of the disordered mind, beginning with the off kilter madhouse sets of Caligari and threading right through a disorienting succession of rubber rooms along the way. But the performance delivered by Claude Reins in "The Invisible Man" easily distinguishes itself in this crowded asylum. What makes his performance all the more amazing is that it's essentially a vocal performance because he doesn't go completely nutso until he goes completely invisible. Then he babbles and laughs and raves his way right until his snowy demise. At the directorial helm was James Whale and his dry wit is found in full regalia here. I never sit through this movie without laughing out loud. Before moving on I should mention that for a short period of time I had dreams of being invisible obviously inspired by this film. Basically I ran around fucking with people and cackling like Claude Reins. Damn good dreams they were.

20. VAMPYR

2006-10-12T00:00:00.000-04:00

20. VAMPYR
(1931)
Directed by Carl Theodor Dreyer

Now we've reached the top twenty and the greatness of the films to follow makes me shudder with morbid glee. I agonized for weeks over the precise order of these choices, pacing up and down my block like a madman, muttering to myself while people who saw me closed their blinds and checked the locks on their doors. But now I've figured it out. Now I'm typing again. Let's continue. "This story is about the strange adventures of young Allan Gray. His studies of devil worship and vampire terror of earlier centuries have made him a dreamer, for whom the boundary between the real and the unreal has become dim." Thus begins the slow and misty dreamscape of Dreyer's "Vampyr", who stated that his aim with this film was to show the horrors of the subconscious mind. He succeeded. Allan Grey, our main character, is traveling when circumstance demands that he stay in a village where an elderly female vampire has been actively enjoying her sanguine repast courtesy of a local girl. This is the earliest take on the already mentioned LeFanu story "Carmilla" but there isn't anything sexy about the female revenant in this loosely adapted version who is an old hunched over woman that no one would want supping at their jugular. The local girl is played by Sybille Schmitz and, in one of my favorite scenes of all time and evermore and what have you, she smiles at her sister, vampirism taking hold, suddenly seeing her sibling as food. Slow, strange, quiet and without any real shocks, this feverish document unfurls in a shadow realm where reality has lost it's hold and troubling dreams hold sway. Overshadowed by Browning's "Dracula" in the year of it's initial release, Dreyer's "Vampyr" is a far more interesting work.

21. FRANKENSTEIN

2006-10-11T00:00:00.000-04:00

21. FRANKENSTEIN
(1931)
Directed by James Whale

Of all the classic monsters, Frankenstein's monster as portrayed by Boris Karloff is the dearest to me. He dangles from the rearview mirror in my car and hangs in a framed movie still on a wall in my humble abode. My deep fondness for the monster finds it's strength in melancholy. He is a grotesque, violent but incredibly sad character. Crafted from various corpses, stitched together and given hideous life by an electrical storm, the monster is born into a wretched existence. Sure, the creature in Mary Shelley's novel differs from this cinematic incarnation but Karloff is brilliant in a wordless performance that conveys all the necessary sorrow, frustration and rage the role demands. Like "Dracula" which was released by Universal Studios earlier in the year, "Frankenstein" is graced with a special creepiness due to it's backdrop of silence. There is no musical soundtrack to speak of (besides the orchestration behind the opening credits) and this makes the buzzing and zapping chaos of the famous resurrection scene come on like real gangbusters. Before "Frankenstein" director James Whale was gaining a reputation for making war movies but after it's incredible success he focused his unique talents on darker fare, managing to direct four bona fide horror monuments between 1931 and 1935 (this one, "Bride of Frankenstein", "The Old Dark House" and "The Invisible Man"). It was the golden age, indeed. The mad scientist, the hunchback assistant (played by Dwight Frye who specialized in the role of bughouse accomplice), the moody overcast cemetery, the angry torch-wielding villagers, the little girl getting tossed into the lake- "Frankenstein" will lumber around in my imagination until they plant me beneath the sod.

22. NOSFERATU

2006-10-10T00:00:00.000-04:00

22. NOSFERATU
(1921)
Directed by F.W. Murnau

"Nosferatu. Does not this word sound like the call of the death bird at midnight? You dare not say it since the pictures of life will fade into dark shadows; ghostly dreams will rise from your heart and feed on your blood." That is how this landmark in silent cinema opens and what follows is the story of "Dracula" re-told with the names changed and with a hideous, gaunt, cadaverous bald creature replacing the more appealing Count of the novel. These changes were a weak attempt to cover copyright infringement. The author Bram Stoker had died less than ten years before filming started in Germany and when his wife Florence found out she understandably raised hell. Florence Stoker, by the way, was quite a lady who was also courted by the flamboyant Oscar Wilde. But I digress. Regardless of the ethical shortcomings Murnau was guilty of when mounting this project, the results are spectacular. Because this isn't some film school lesson I won't bother with listing the innovations and technical mastery that Murnau displayed here but let's just say that he crafted a multi-layered work that can be appreciated from a variety of critical angles. On a base level (which is where my running commentary unfortunately tends to reside) the star of the proceedings is, of course, the vampire played by Max Schreck. Images of him rising stiff as a board out of his coffin or creeping forward into a blackened castle doorway can still deliver the shivers.

23. BLACK SUNDAY

2006-10-09T00:00:00.000-04:00

23. BLACK SUNDAY
(1961)
Directed by Mario Bava

This is the story of Princess Asa and her lover man Javuto who, as the fable informs us, were quite a pair in 17th Century Moldavia. They dabbled in witchcraft and were put to death by hooded inquisitors in a gruesome manner. The movie begins with the execution of Asa (played by Barbara Steele in her first horror role) and just before the sentence is handed down she spits out a curse on her brother, who is there at the grim torch lit proceedings to convey his condemnation, then the mask of Satan, with spikes on the inside, is nailed to her face and a violent storm erupts. Quite a beginning to quite a movie. It's supposedly based on the Gogol story "The Vij" which is a truly bizarre bit of Russian horror about a man praying in a church over the dead body of a witch while demons from Hell torment him and the coffin where she lies flies around in the air. None of that happens in "Black Sunday" but there is plenty of atmosphere in the form of cemetery ruins, spectral coach and horses soundlessly thundering along in slow motion, and spooky walks through the woods. Barbara turns in a double performance as both the resurrected witch and her descendent Princess Katia who is drained vampire style by her evil ancestor. This was also Mario Bava's first official directorial gig and I've yet to see another one of his films that comes close to it. My favorite line comes from the resurrected Asa as she lies on her burial slab and writes full of hunger, "Come kiss me, my lips will transform you". That, my friends, is perhaps the greatest come hither request that I've ever heard.

24. DAWN OF THE DEAD

2006-10-08T00:00:00.000-04:00

24. DAWN OF THE DEAD
(1978)
Directed by George Romero

I'm ashamed to say that I've never been to Pittsburgh but it's on my list of future vacation spots. George Romero and Tom Savini are the two big reasons why. They both hail from this fine city built on steel and it was their combined talents that made "Dawn of the Dead" the great movie that it is. The two actually met in high school and Savini would've been on board for the original "Night of the Living Dead" (1968) if he hadn't been called away by Vietnam. His experience in that war as a combat photographer gave him the chilling first hand experience with real gore and human death that would inform his innovative special effects. He would contribute his talents to a bunch of films including the brainless splatter fest "Friday the 13th" (1980) but "Dawn of the Dead" is the best. In David J. Skal's essential history of 20th Century horror "The Monster Show" he eloquently links the Vietnam experience with the visceral new brand of cinema that followed, "Horror films of the seventies and eighties began exhibiting symptoms remarkably similar to some of those suffered by victims of post-traumatic stress syndrome: startle reactions, paranoia, endless scenes of guerilla-like stalking, and, like traumatic flashbacks, endlessly repeated images of nightmare assaults on the human body, especially it's sudden and explosive destruction". "Dawn of the Dead" has some memorable mayhem. A group of four humans barricade themselves inside a mall to keep a growing number of ravenous zombies at bay but the hungry dead eventually spill inside while battling a crazed group of bikers and the violence escalates into a true bloodbath. This is an intelligent and troubling work co-produced by Dario Argento that has lost none of it's power. "Day of the Dead" followed in 1985 and continued to document the zombie apocalypse in an increasingly bleak fashion.

25. NIGHT OF THE HUNTER

2006-10-07T03:00:00.000-04:00

25. NIGHT OF THE HUNTER
(1955)
Directed by Charles Laughton

Robert Mitchum was a cool motherfucker who had little use for the Hollywood scene where he became an anomalous and unlikely star. In the 1940's he seemed to find a special place for his talents in Film Noir, playing the laconic tough guy with the soft spot for all the wrong ladies (see "Out of the Past" (1947) and "Angel Face"(1953) for fine examples of his knack for playing the chump). He was busted for reefer possession around this time and locked up for awhile but friends in high places came to his aid, namely the loaded lunatic Howard Hughes, and Mitchum survived. His laid back, cigarette on the lip, slow talking demeanor would be turned on it's head in 1955 with one of the hallmarks in homicidal performances, the twisted preacher Harry Powell in "Night of the Hunter". Quoting from scripture and brandishing his switchblade with equal enthusiasm he is the scariest monster to emerge on film in the 1950's. Across the knuckles on one hand he has the letters L-O-V-E tattooed and on the other H-A-T-E. I think you might guess which hand runs the show. Greedy and psychotic he is driven to get his tattooed hands on a widow's money so he murders her and, when her two children stand in his way, sets out to kill them, too. This was Charles Laughton's only directorial gig and he crafted moments of rare and unsettling beauty, especially the dead woman sunken in her car, hair flowing in the gentle current as fish glide by. Mitchum had one more memorable psycho in him, the sicko Max Cady in 1962's "Cape Fear", and would be given a fitting send-off in a small but juicy role in Jim Jarmusch's "Dead Man"(1998).

26. THE LAST MAN ON EARTH

2006-10-06T03:00:00.000-04:00

26. THE LAST MAN ON EARTH
(1964)
Directed by Ubaldo Ragona, Sidney Salkow

Yes, here we have my favorite Vincent Price movie and it's based on one of my favorite novels of all time, 1954's "I Am Legend" by Richard Matheson. This slender and genius book tells the tale of a man bunkered down in his house while the outside world crawls with vampires. Of course the bloodsuckers have to sleep during the day and this is when our lead character (played by Vincent Price in the movie) sets out to stake and burn as many as he can before the sun falls and he must return to his lair. His prolific killing has made him a legend (hence the book title) to be feared among the infected creatures outside and the tension increases as they close in on him. These aren't conventional vampires. They've reached their undead state due to a nasty plague that kills them then animates their corpses. For those not in the know, Matheson was a great and prolific writer who penned numerous genre standards, including some memorable episodes for "The Twilight Zone" television show. "I Am Legend" was filmed in Italy on a tight budget and the result is a somber bit of cinema that comes very close to capturing the feel of the novel. Vincent Price seems a bit depressed by the stark atmosphere and his performance is appropriately subdued. As an added accolade, George Romero cites it as an influence on a little low budget affair he'd film a few years later called "Night of the Living Dead" (1968).

27. AT MIDNIGHT I'LL TAKE YOUR SOUL

2006-10-05T03:00:00.000-04:00

27. AT MIDNIGHT I'LL TAKE YOUR SOUL
(1964)
directed by Jose Mojica Marins

You want a real evil villain? I submit the one and only Coffin Joe. Certainly one of the most despicable characters to slime across the screen in horror history, he was created and portrayed in several movies by the infamous Brazilian director Jose Mojica Marins. Wearing a top hat and black cape, bearded and wielding long curling fingernails, Coffin Joe is an undertaker who does not believe in God and who has cultivated a powerful hatred for all things superstitious in the process. When he gets pissed his eyes go bloodshot and then all hell breaks loose. His philosophy is summed up in a memorable sequence when he bellows drunkenly at a gathering wind that is presumably filled with the spirits of the dead, "Nothing is stronger than my disbelief!". Since he has the townsfolk cowering in fear and he is not fettered to any conviction in judgment after death, he freely indulges in his sadistic whims and the list of his atrocities in this film is sickening: He murders his wife, drowns his best friend after bludgeoning him, rapes his best friend's wife and is responsible for her suicide, gouges the eyes out of a nosy physician and then lights him on fire and that's not all. The grainy low budget appearance of the movie somehow makes the violence more convincing and distressing. It's obviously not a nice story but through the progression of these uncomfortable sequences it becomes clear that ghastly retribution awaits at the hands of the angry dead. Even though it's some four decades old it is not for the faint of heart but I've always found it's sheer nastiness oddly compelling. Coffin Joe appeared in a sequel two years later called "This Night I Will Possess Your Corpse" where, after more behaving badly, he is literally dragged into Hell by a faceless demon. Upon meeting the Devil Coffin Joe yells at him "You do not exist!". Now that's some powerful atheism.

28. THE CAT AND THE CANARY

2006-10-04T03:00:00.000-04:00

28. THE CAT AND THE CANARY
(1927)
Directed by Paul Leni

The wealthy Cyrus West, thought insane by his greedy relatives, has kicked the bucket and twenty years on his will and testament can finally be read in the creepy old house where he spent his final days. Of course his ghost is still hanging around, according to the severe and spooky housekeeper, but this can't keep a passel of greedy relatives away. They all show up, the will is read and news arrives that an escaped lunatic nicknamed the Cat is on the loose and probably hiding somewhere in the old house. He's called the Cat because he apparently can shred people to bloody ribbons as if they were canaries. And so a long spooky night begins in this, the finest adaptation of the 1922 John Wilard play of the same name. Much credit should be given to director Paul Leni who used touches of expressionism and inventive camera work to bring the eerie old mansion to life with shadows, cobwebs and long hallways of billowing drapes. I've always found something inherently spooky about silent movies and anything involving haunted houses and murder is a special treat, for sure. Old dark house spoofs were quite popular and this is the best. You've probably become well accustomed to the cliches and conventions of such tales which long ago became a part of pop culture (from old cartoons to the Three Stooges and so on) but "The Cat and the Canary" is the root source. It's an entertaining and humorous romp and the Cat is looking sharp with his one monstrously big eye, walrus teeth, flop hat and cape. Yikes!

29. ALIEN

2006-10-03T03:00:00.000-04:00

29. ALIEN
(1979)
Directed by Ridley Scott

There are many reasons to sing the praises of this movie but the big kudos goes to Swiss artist H.R. Giger for designing the menacing monster in the many m anifestations of it's growth and the nightmarish world it inhabits. No monster on this list can match Giger's creation in sheer nastiness. It's appropriate that his art first gained widespread acclaim with an H.P. Lovecraft inspired collection of paintings called "H.R. Giger's Necronomicon" and the snapping and slimy creature from deep space in "Alien" certainly has it's Lovecraftian appeal. There aren't many movies that got my heart thumping as hard as this one did the first time I saw it and recent viewings have also had a noticeable effect on my pulse. While the outer space setting is certainly the domain of science fiction this is a bona fide horror movie on every level. The fear escalates and the insinuations are as dark as they come. No matter where our ingenuity and science takes us in the universe it's a guarantee that, being mere mortals powerless against an unforeseen legion of hostilities, we will find horror. In fact our further explorations seem to guarantee these encounters and it's hard to imagine anything more hostile than the windblown gothic planet of darkness where the crew of the Nostromo ends up. Sigourney Weaver survived the acid dripping alien to star in the sequels but they didn't match the impact and claustrophobic isolation of the original. Very grim, very good.

30. CARNIVAL OF SOULS

2006-10-02T03:00:00.000-04:00

30. CARNIVAL OF SOULS
(1962)
Directed by Herk Harvey

Because this is a list of my personal favorites it naturally reveals my own idiosyncratic likes and the presence of "Carnival of Souls" is due in large part to my natural affinity for abandoned places and pipe organs. I'll also admit to a special fondness for black and white movies (there are 38 on this list if I counted correctly). So when you add these elements together and start it all off with a drag race, well, it has Johnny Refund written all over it. Candace Hilligoss stars as the haunted survivor of the ill-fated drag race and, between playing church organ to make rent and fending off the advances of a greaseball rummy in her rooming house, she is plagued with visions of the dead. She acquires a morbid fixation with an empty and trashed amusement park by the ocean where she eventually confronts and is chased by a ballroom filled with the waltzing departed. The movie is blessed with that strange and highly personal atmosphere that can only be found in low budget affairs of this time period. Fascinating and strange, it has become a cult classic recently given the royal treatment in a fancy and expensive DVD reissue by Criterion.

31. CAT PEOPLE

2006-10-01T03:00:00.000-04:00

31. CAT PEOPLE
(1942)
Directed by Jacques Tourneur

Times were lean for good horror movies in the 1940's but thankfully those into darker fare had the seedy and menacing world of film noir to discover. Born in the Great Depression, these flicks were laden with crime, heartbreak, menace, deceit and body counts that rivaled anything horror was producing. Next to the gun wielding tough guys and back stabbing dames of film noir the tired Universal monsters, now paraded out in increasingly demeaning sequels, looked a bit shabby and tame indeed. But there were a handful of exceptions of interest to monster kids and most of them were produced by Val Lewton for RKO Pictures. The best of these were both directed by Jacques Tourneur, "I Walked With a Zombie" (1943) and "Cat People" (1942). Lewton and Tourneur were in agreement that the best chills could be produced by playing with the imagination of the audience, suggesting horrible things with shadows and sound, giving people the black canvas where they could etch out the creature for themselves, without ever really revealing anything. This worked incredibly well with "Cat People". Simone Simon plays a European immigrant in New York City who lives in fear that she carries with her a Slavic curse that will turn her into a murderous black panther if her sexual impulses are awakened. When her husband starts getting friendly with another woman we find out that jealousy can bring out the beast as well. The modern urban setting, sense of dread and use of long shadows owes much to film noir and a few years later Tourneur would create "Out of the Past" (1947) for RKO, one of the genre's crowning achievements. As for horror cinema, well, it was going through a Post-War transition but, as always, would return with a vengeance.

32. INVASION OF THE BODY SNATCHERS

2006-09-30T03:00:00.000-04:00

32. INVASION OF THE BODY SNATCHERS
(1956)
Directed by Don Siegel

When I was a youngster I had a recurring nightmare where I suddenly realized that all the adults in my little world- family, neighbors, teachers- were actually some unholy breed of inhuman zombies and this realization gave off a powerful scent that they detected and I was forced to run for my life through the streets, pursued relentlessly. After waking up with my heart pounding I'd lie there with the sheet pulled over my head, certain that my dream was a vision of the truth. I had my suspicions, as time went on, that this was a common bit of paranoid delusion and when I first saw "Invasion of the Body Snatchers" I felt validated. An alien race is replacing people with emotionless and soulless doubles and Dr. Miles (Kevin McCarthy) and his sweetheart (Dana Wynter) are on the run first in their 1955 Ford Sedan and then on foot. I don't know about you, but I think fear of mindless conformity is a healthy fear to have. Be very afraid! The pod people in "Invasion of the Body Snatchers" are ultra squares! It's a hipsters nightmare! "You fools, you're in danger!" "They're here already!" "You're next!", Pardon me while my hair stands on end... Made in typical breakneck B-movie fashion (a 19 day shoot) this is the best of the rash of invasion movies that proliferated across Drive-In screens in the fifties (other highly recommended notables of this variety are "Teenagers From Mars" (1959), "It Came From Outer Space" (1953), and "Invaders From Mars" (1953)). More than just a metaphoric outgrowth of the Red Scare, "Body Snatchers" is relevant in any society (or subculture, for that matter) where conformity is rigorously endorsed. Keep sticking pitchforks into those pods, keep kicking against the pricks and watch this flick every now and then to remind you why the effort is worth it.

33. BLOOD FEAST

2006-09-29T03:00:00.000-04:00

33. BLOOD FEAST
(1963)
Directed by Herschell Gordon Lewis

Yes, thee legendary first gore film and after 40 years it still retains it's irresistibly trashy charm. The villain, Fuad Ramses, runs a store and specializes in "Exotic Catering" but it's all just a front for his real purpose in life- to worship an ancient Egyptian goddess and murder young girls in her honor. The acting caliber is consistently on the Ed Wood Jr. level, complete with hapless cops, and that provides many unintentionally laugh out loud moments but the real attraction is the copious amounts of the red stuff. Victims have their legs hacked off, brains removed and tongues ripped out, all in lurid bloody color. One can only imagine what a shock this was to unsuspecting drive-in audiences at the time of it's release. I can't help but envision youngsters hanging out of their car doors to puke into the dirt. Nix that make-out session, sailor... There was really nothing to prepare folks for this kind of gruesome display. The whole shoestring affair is bolstered by an organ and kettle drum score provided by the multi-talented impresario behind this new wave in exploitation, Herschell Gordon Lewis. H.G. was paid homage by most exalted keepers of the cool, John Waters (with his early Divine vehicle "Multiple Maniacs"(1970)) and the Cramps (with their rockin' tune "I Ain't Nothin' But a Gorehound"). "Well, Frank, this looks like one of those long hard ones."

34. WHITE ZOMBIE

2006-09-28T03:00:00.000-04:00

34. WHITE ZOMBIE
(1932)
Directed by Victor Halperin

Bela, Bela... There are five Bela Lugosi films on this list and this reveals my weakness for the tragic Hungarian actor. Doomed to eke out a living by making a series of truly awful movies through the 1940's and 50's and never fully escaping the role of Dracula that he became inexorably identified with, it's easy for folks to forget that Bela played more than the caped Count. His role as zombie master Murder Legendre in "White Zombie" is easily one of his best non-vampire turns. Made on what can fairly be called a meager budget in less than two weeks, it's the first zombie movie ever and a markedly atmospheric tale that unfolds in a morose and misty dreamsville. Do not expect anything approaching reality in this one. And you certainly shouldn't expect some authentic anthropological study of Vodoun. This is a slow and eerie spellcaster that exists in it's own fabricated realm filled with graveyard scenes, shuffling living dead, squawking vultures, waxy voodoo dolls and sinister villainy. Lugosi's character lives in a very European looking castle on a jagged shoreline in what is supposed to be Haiti where his new plaything is a freshly zombified woman (Madge Bellamy) whom he has cruelly called away on her wedding night. My favorite scene finds the distraught husband drowning his sorrows in a Haitian tavern where he hallucinates the image of his buried wife beckoning from beyond the clammy grave. Acting out this scene while imbibing in local redneck bars has done little to help me make new friends.

35. THE CABINET OF DR. CALIGARI

2006-09-27T03:00:00.000-04:00

35. THE CABINET OF DR. CALIGARI
(1919)
Director Robert Wiene

Here we have the oldest film on the list and it's the first true horror masterpiece. The silent era was a period of constant innovation as filmmakers wrestled with the constraints of the new medium and "The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari" was a monstrous leap forward. It was completed in the bloody wake of the First World War when all manner of convention-smashing artistic waves came emanating off the ravaged European continent, from the cubism of Picasso to the dissonant musical experiments of Schoenberg and Stravinsky. "Caligari" found it's inspiration in the expressionistic movement and it's distinct style would have a huge influence on horror films to follow, especially the celebrated cycle of Universal monster movies made in the 1930's (particularly the Frankenstein pictures directed by James Whale). But none of those movies that followed dared to replicate the extreme appearance of Wiene's world. The action takes place in a dream landscape, filled with warped angular buildings and painted shadows intended to be visual manifestations of the disordered mind. This incredibly stylized universe is the backdrop for a yarn about a magician (Werner Krauss) and his star attraction the somnambulist (Conrad Veidt) who slumbers in a coffin shaped box. The magician sends his sleeping meal ticket on nocturnal missions to carry out murders. This is necessary viewing for any horror fan and ladies with morbid leanings are sure to swoon at the sight of the insect thin and strikingly handsome somnambulist.

36. PSYCHO

2006-09-26T03:00:00.000-04:00

36. PSYCHO
(1960)
Director Alfred Hitchcock

There had been movies about human monsters before but this one hit the scene like an atom bomb and got a generation of nervous people thinking about knives while in the shower. The house on the hill where bad things happen is an old gothic trapping but "Psycho" was the explosive declaration of a new era of horror and a strong argument could be made that it's the most important such film of the century and yes, I do believe I've made this very proclamation at a bar or two down the way. Hitchcock was in the midst of his final cycle of important films (his career started way back in the silent era) that included "North by Northwest" (1959), "The Birds" (1963), and that genius masterwork of obsession, "Vertigo" (1958). There's a different kind of obsession going on in "Psycho". Norman Bates (Anthony Perkins) can't accept the fact that his mother is dead so he keeps her mummified corpse around and talks in her voice. She tells him bad things. Poor Marion Crane (Janet Leigh) has no idea what kind of twisted mess she's stepped into when she decides to stay awhile in the Bates Motel. Graced by the usual high caliber of suspense one expects from Hitchcock and scored by legendary music man Bernard Herrmann, "Psycho" deserves it's lofty stature. This is also the movie that sparked my interest in taxidermy.

37. CEMETERY MAN

2006-09-25T03:00:00.000-04:00

37. CEMETERY MAN
(1994)
Directed by Michele Soavi

This is the third and final movie from the 1990's to make my list (the other two being "Dead Alive" (1992) and "The Blair Witch Project" (1999)) and you might properly surmise that I don't consider this a particularly fruitful decade for horror films. "Se7en" (1995) was dark and interesting and "Scream" (1996) was a clever and thrilling ride but these are rare exceptions in a time period that left monster kids with a choice between a steady stream of yawn-inducing formula driven teen-oriented Hollywood horror and straight-to-video efforts from the likes of Troma and Full Moon. The latter were more subversive, ridiculous and entertaining, of course, but none can really compare to the grand mess that is "Cemetery Man". Directed by Argento apprentice Michele Soavi, it has assloads of visual flair and black humor. Rupert Everett stars as Francesco Dellamorte, cemetery caretaker, and for some reason the recently buried dead are clawing out of their graves and need to be dispatched a second time to stay down. Dellamorte tends to the problem with jaded precision but then things get complicated when a grieving widow with an erotic attraction to ossuaries played by jaw-dropping beauty Anna Falchi comes into his boneyard. The proceedings get increasingly strange until reality is abandoned altogether by the baffling final sequence. Nestled between the zombies and violence are moments of disarming visual beauty. A truly original movie from a disappointing decade.

38. THE BAD SEED

2006-09-24T03:00:00.000-04:00

38. THE BAD SEED
(1956)
Directed by Mervyn LeRoy

Children can be nasty, can't they? Even seemingly sweet kids can be shockingly cruel to other children and, as we find out in "The Bad Seed", sometimes they can be dangerous to full grown adults as well. The notion that a kid can be born wicked is not a pleasant one for parents to consider but the truth is that children have been responsible for some ghastly crimes. How young is too young to be a sociopath? Little Rhoda Penmark (Patty McCormack) is eight years old and when our story begins she's already killed at least once. "The Bad Seed" was first a novel and then it was adapted to the stage before being turned into this esteemed film version. Visually the movie is very simple and more often than not just seems like a taped version of a theatrical performance what with it's static camera shots, a plot driven almost entirely by dialogue and only a couple basic sets. Still, it's strength is it's story and the marvelously sinister/sweet performance by the young McCormack (who had also played the pig-tailed killer in the stage version). Especially delightful are the exchanges she has with creepy caretaker LeRoy (played with greasy acumen by Henry Jones) who makes the mistake of finding out too much about the little girl's crimes and gets burned alive by her as a result. I think part of my ongoing fondness for this movie is that it was released in the ultra-conservative family value 1950's and it shook people up. Shaking people up is important, after all, especially when they've been lulled into suburban complacency. Since "The Bad Seed" there have been many evil children movies but this, friends and nervous parents, is the original.

39. HENRY: PORTRAIT OF A SERIAL KILLER

2006-09-23T03:00:00.000-04:00

39. HENRY: PORTRAIT OF A SERIAL KILLER
(1986)
Directed by John McNaughton

The true story of Henry Lee Lucas is a fucked bit of American Gothic. Dirt poor, he was horribly abused as a child by his drunken prostitute mother and legless stepfather, suffering brain damage and losing an eye in the process. In the midst of the abuses and humiliations he was introduced to necrophilia with a dead animal by one of his mother's clients at an early age. Evil had staked a claim on the young lad. He killed his mother, spent a few years in a Michigan prison and, after getting paroled, took to the road where he turned into a murder machine for the next eight years, teamed up with his lover, a bisexual pyromaniac named Otis Toole. "Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer" is the low budget cult classic that is loosely based on the exploits of Henry and Otis and it's a genuinely unsettling and extremely dark ride. Michael Rooker's portrayal of Henry is chilling and the violence is often so realistic that the movie takes on the distressing feel of a documentary or snuff film. I think most people watch horror movies to be entertained and to open the release valve on a variety of anxieties, mainly those concerning death, but movies like "Henry" offer paltry threads of solace and leave a person with little more than a lingering sense of trepidation. Therein lies it's rare power. Realistic horror like this forces us to confront awful realities without the consoling accoutrements of metaphor or myth. There are horrible monsters out there in the American night. Death can be waiting at the next interstate exit and that death could be horrible and painful. A memento mori from me to you.

40. THE SHINING

2006-09-22T03:00:00.000-04:00

40. THE SHINING
(1980)
Directed by Stanley Kubrick

Well, now we have officially entered the top 40. How exciting. Time to pay a visit to the Overlook Hotel. Many folks who have spent a few winters in colder climates are likely familiar with that restless claustrophobic condition known as cabin fever. A deep snowbound winter can do funny things to a person. Sometimes you end up drinking more than usual and watching too much hockey. In the case of Jack Torrance (played by Jack Nicholson) you end up losing your mind completely and turning homicidal. Stanley Kubrick, given his penchant for slowly roving and eerie exploration of interior spaces, was a perfect choice to direct this adaptation of the Stephen King novel. Kubrick began his career with horror (as did both Coppola and Spielberg) and flirted with the horrific in many of his films, from the psycho robot Hal in "2001, a Space Odyssey" (1968) to the Beethoven-crazed hooligans in "A Clockwork Orange" (1971). But "The Shining" is his only full blown effort in the genre and quite an effort it was. The memorable images are legion: Jack limping along with his axe, the apparition of the murdered twins, Shelly Duvall screaming with kitchen knife in hand as Jack whacks his way through the door, blood spilling from the elevator in cascading splashes, the naked and cackling old woman and, of course, the terror of the snowy garden maze. Nicholson plays the part of the psychopath with an over the top intensity that recalls Dwight Frye and Vincent Price.

41. THE TINGLER

2006-09-21T03:00:00.000-04:00

41. THE TINGLER
(1959)
Directed by William Castle

It was the late 1950's and there was a fear among filmmakers that the hypnotic blue glow of the television set was keeping too many kids away from the movie theatre. Exploitation genius William Castle was devoted to the task of filling seats and he embarked on a series of gimmicks to sell tickets to his films. It started in 1958 when he spread the word that he'd set up an insurance policy with Lloyds of London in case anyone died of fright while watching his movie "Macabre". The ruse worked, money rolled in and he followed it the next year with Emergo the flying skeleton in connection with "House on Haunted Hill" and then the ass shocking Percepto trick for "The Tingler". These gimmicks are detailed in loving fashion by John Waters in his essay "Whatever Happened to Showmanship?" (in short Percepto was nothing more than a couple electric buzzers delivered with the film canisters to be set up beneath random seats that could be activated to deliver a mild shock at strategic points in the movie). People loved it. Waters calls "The Tingler" "the fondest moviegoing memory of my youth" and, even without the thrill of being in a theatre of screaming kids, the movie remains highly entertaining. There are a lot of good reasons to watch this one. It stars Vincent Price, features the cinema's first ever LSD sequence and the tingler itself (a creature that grows on a persons spinal column in moments of fright) is a wonderfully disgusting wormy crustacean. Scream for your life!

42. KING KONG

2006-09-20T03:00:00.000-04:00

42. KING KONG
(1933)
Director Ernest B. Schoedsask & Merian C. Cooper

The mighty Kong toppling all bloodied from the Empire State Building breaks my heart every time. The great ape destroyed by tiny stupid humans. Damn, as if someone like me needs something else to feed his misanthropy. But hey, to state the obvious, one of the functions of horror is to cast a light on those less than admirable aspects of the human condition. It's why horror makes people uncomfortable. Let's talk of Kong. He was taken from his tropical isle to the concrete jungle of Manhattan in bondage and put on shameful display which is enough to make any colossal gorilla go on a fucking rampage. And who can blame the big lunk for turning into a lovestruck sap over Fay Wray (no relation to Link, by the way)? Seems like his Achilles' heel was having a heart bigger than his brain. Poor Kong. I'm sure that having a cock the size of a church bus didn't help, either. But it's these faults that endear Kong to the viewer and any sympathy evoked is due to Willis O'Brien whose pioneering stop-motion animation brought the monster to life. Yeah, some of you less cultured cretins out there might snicker at the effects over 70 years later but wipe the drool off your chin and get thee a history lesson. "King Kong" was a quantum leap in special effects and in a shocking exhibition of good public taste it became the big movie sensation of 1933. Strong arguments can and have been made that hail this the greatest monster movie of all time. "It was beauty that killed the beast". You said it, brother.

43. MARK OF THE VAMPIRE

2006-09-19T03:00:00.000-04:00

43. MARK OF THE VAMPIRE
(1935)
Directed by Tod Browning

Here is another Bela Lugosi-as-vampire movie directed by Tod Browning. "Mark of the Vampire" is a remake of Browning's 1927 silent movie "London After Midnight" which starred Lon Chaney with a mouth full of razor sharp teeth, creeping along in a tophat. Bela wisely chose to play the vampire in his patented Dracula mode instead of attempting to match or copy the Chaney performance. Here he is joined by his attractive protege Carol Borland who had known Bela since his days of performing "Dracula" on stage when she became understandably obsessed with the dashing Hungarian. She is stunning as she languishes through the night in her burial gown, ghostly pale with long black hair. She was not only an inspiration for Morticia Adams but also, whether they knew it or not, a legion of Goth girls who cultivated a serene post mortem allure that made the libidos of monster kids, male and female, spike off the charts many years later. Pale girls in black with dirty minds and death in their eyes have always caused me all manner of pleasant distractions and distresses. Carol Borland was an original. Beyond her presence, "Mark of the Vampire" is director Tod Browning's last good film and Wong Howe's photography is exquisite. Of course many of you reading this may already know that this is essentially a murder mystery but the horror elements are strong enough to make up for the cheater ending.

44. DRACULA

2006-09-18T03:00:00.000-04:00

44. DRACULA
(1931)
Directed by Tod Browning

No character from horror fiction has been the subject of as many filmic interpretations as Dracula and no performance has defined the role of the Count in the popular imagination as much as Bela Lugosi's. He'd been playing Dracula in a stage version that began it's run in 1927 at the Fulton Theatre in New York but he wasn't the first choice for the part when Universal Studios began planning a silver screen version. They wanted Lon Chaney but Lon had taken his thousand faces into the afterlife by that point. Now the idea of Chaney in the role makes for some intriguing conjecture but Bela turned out to be a perfect fit. It's safe to say that Lugosi had a powerful connection with the role even though he would complain later on that his relentless identification as a bloodsucker ruined his chance to play serious romantic leads and such. But Bela was born to be in horror. Bela was Dracula. The undeniable high point of this movie arrives in the incredibly moody and stygian initial minutes when we see the crypt and the castle interior and the cobwebbed staircase and the brides. The eerie silence in these scenes delivers the shivers even now. Unfortunately the gothic majesty of the opening isn't sustained but Bela makes it all worthwhile, not to mention Dwight Frye's legendary unhinged performance of the fly eating basket case Renfield. No other Renfield comes close and his gets my vote for the greatest laugh in movie history. It should also be mentioned that "Dracula" made truckloads of money for Universal and inaugurated the parade of godhead Universal monster movies that continued through the decade. "I don't drink... wine."

45. CASTLE OF BLOOD

2006-09-17T03:00:00.000-04:00

45. CASTLE OF BLOOD
(1964)
Directed by Antonio Margheriti

Here we have the third Barbara Steele movie on the list so far and believe me, I showed great restraint when picking movies graced with her presence. You could say I'm a bit of a fan. Horror often deals with the travails of duality and she expressed some powerful contradictions like no woman before or since- innocent and corrupt, cadaverous and voluptuous, lovely and monstrous. Barbara was a conduit for the repressed to spill through. "Castle of Blood" is another tale of the gothic. It's a tale of castle ghosts who became trapped in the twilight realm between the living and the way gone in a sex driven and bloody fashion. It's a tale of a foolish chap who wagers that he can spend a night in this haunted castle and ends up vexed by several visitations of the spectral variety. One of these haints is Barbara and she is especially fetching here as she drifts flirty and mad through the shadows in her nightgown. This gem is loaded with funereal beauty, murder and a even a bit of nudity. Oh, yes, the trousers may tighten... other Barbara Steele movies of high esteem to track down are "The Horrible Dr. Hichcock" (1962), it's follow-up "The Ghost" (1963), and "Nightmare Castle" (1963). These are all Italian films and they are all, without exception, dubbed poorly and sometimes the hammy voices that are used come off as fucking ridiculous but "Castle of Blood" is hampered little by this drawback. Margheriti, along with Riccardo Freda and especially Mario Bava, made Italy a hot spot for horror in the 1960's and this bloody torch would be famously passed on to creepy bowl-cut genius Dario Argento.

46. CURSE OF THE DEMON

2006-09-16T03:00:00.000-04:00

46. CURSE OF THE DEMON
(1957)
Directed by Jacques Tourneur

I don't know about you but when I was a kid I was fascinated by that cue-ball headed demonologist Aleister Crowley. To my knowledge there's never been a movie made specifically about him but he's clearly the inspiration for Dr. Karswell, master of the occult in "Curse of the Demon". This is not the kind of man you want to mess with but that's just what a certain Dr. Holden (played by Dana Andrews) is compelled to do. Dana Andrews became a star in 1944 with the highly recommended crime thriller "Laura" (which also starred a young Vincent Price in the role of a sleazy playboy) but, perhaps due to his battles with the bottle, he never lived up to his potential. "Curse of the Demon" may be his finest moment and he does a great job playing the part of a man pursued by intangible supernatural forces. Director Jacques Tourneur proved himself a master of shadow and suspense in the 1940's and all of his directorial talents are on display here. Few horror films after this relied so heavily on (and succeeded so well with) summoning fright through the mere power of suggestion. As far as the storyline is concerned there is a piece of parchment adorned with runes that spells doom for whomever has it when the demon comes calling but, as the song penned years later pointed out, "Dana Andrews said prunes, gave him the runes, and passing them used lots of skills." Terrible chills, indeed.

47. NEAR DARK

2006-09-15T03:00:00.000-04:00

47. NEAR DARK
(1987)
Directed by Kathryn Bigelow

There were some fucking awful vampire movies in the 1980's, what with goofy shit fests like "Fright Night" (1985) and "The Lost Boys" (1987), but that generally vapid decade did provide horror fans with one bona fide bloodsucking landmark. "Near Dark" is a true original that evades the usual trappings of capes and bats and stakes. It captures the panic of a traveling group of undead in a windblown American desert as they travel from one gruesome roadside repast to the next, always on the run, crashing in shitty motels instead of the traditional coffins, and always dreading sunrise. It's hard not to feel sorry for this bunch. There really isn't too much romanticism to be found in their transient existence and it's clear that their days are numbered. The leader of the pack is an old Confederate soldier played by Lance Henriksen (also in "Aliens") and it's most vicious member is the demented cowboy played by Bill Paxton who deep sixes victims with razor sharp spurs. Fucking scary. The one scene that has always stuck with me shows us the dirty bunch of road grizzled vampires descend on a honky tonk where they proceed to murder and drain everyone inside to the strains of "Fever" as covered by the Cramps.

48. A BUCKET OF BLOOD

2006-09-14T03:00:00.000-04:00

48. A BUCKET OF BLOOD
(1959)
Directed by Roger Corman

Walter Paisley the bus boy pays the rent in his dirty dingy and really beat bachelor dive by scurrying from table to table in a smoky beatnik bar called the Yellow Door where poets and painters and unshaven reefer headed deadbeats pass their hours waxing pretentious about the noble path of the artist and this bugs Walter to no end because he's got a notion stashed in his lid that he can swing it like an artist himself by working clay into mad sculptures but the simple minded milquetoast just doesn't have the chops until he accidentally impales the landlady's cat on a kitchen knife and adds clay to cover up the goof then presto he has his first masterpiece that he calls "Dead Cat" and the reception his sculpture gets at the Yellow Door really busts his conk and one murder leads to another and with some clay over corpses he is hailed as a full blown gasser, ace and hip and groovy and crazy and all the rest, but the gambit can't last and soon the word is out that Walter has gone blowtop in pursuit of his art and his stay on the bohemian throne is a short one and he's forced to pull a Houdini when his murders are revealed and the scene gets too hot to stay cool. Crazy, man, crazy. The wildest. Fracture your wig with this black comedy for a finger popping good time. Beatnik horror, baby. It's way out.

49. THE HAUNTING

2006-09-13T00:00:00.000-04:00

49. THE HAUNTING
(1963)
Directed by Robert Wise

Shirley Jackson's "The Haunting of Hill House" retains it's well deserved status as one of the greatest haunted house novels ever and it was given a fitting treatment in this film version. As a matter of well reasoned opinion, this flick stands as one of the best novel to screen adaptations ever, capturing the creeping unease and moody atmospherics that Jackson brought to life with her prose. She was one helluva writer who lived in New England, apparently had a huge collection of occult books and claimed to be a witch. Next time you're in the library and in need of good dark reading get your paws on some Shirley Jackson. And the next time you're in the video store you might want to give the movie version a shot. The only reason it isn't higher on my list is that for some reason Julie Harris's voiceover has a tendency to annoy me a bit. Too whiney (oh, that tastes like blasphemy on my tongue but fuck it). Much has been made of the less than subtle lesbian tension between her character and the character played by the alluring and slightly wicked Claire Bloom but not enough has been made of Russ Tamblyn who also graced the screen in 1950's juvenile delinquent movies (the greatest I've ever seen, "High School Confidential" (1958)), 1960's biker movies (especially "Satan's Sadists"(1969)) and on David Lynch's "Twin Peaks"(1990). He plays a good skeptical smart aleck in "The Haunting", a movie that just might be the best haunted house tale to ever shiver across the flickers.

50. ANGEL HEART

2006-09-12T00:00:00.000-04:00

50. ANGEL HEART
(1987)
Directed by Alan Parker

This is what you'd call a good old fashioned New Orleans style voodoo sex horror identity crisis movie. The rich, provocative, dark and off kilter feel reminds me of a Tom Waits record- all moody blood grease booze and smoke rolling with a Satanic undertow. The story, based on a 1979 novel by William Hjortsberg, is a clever take on the old Raymond Chandler style of private detective narrative (and let it be known that the hardboiled school of crime writers enjoy a prominent place on my bookshelves and I consider it a shame that horror and noir haven't knocked boots more often). Mickey Rourke plays private dick Harry Angel who is hired by a mysterious long finger-nailed dapper cat named Louis Cyphre (Robert Deniro) to track down a missing crooner who called himself Johnny Favorite. It's set in the 1950's and the action shifts from snowy New York to steamy New Orleans with corpses piling up along the way in gruesome fashion. Mickey Rourke peaked in 1987. Not only did he nail the role of Harry Angel but he also transformed himself into Charles Bukowski for that ode to the self-medicated lifestyle, "Barfly". In the notoriety department "Angel Heart" stirred up some shinola for a blood drenched fucking scene to the strains of Lavern Baker's sultry torch song "Soul on Fire". Love that song. Love this movie.

51. SON OF FRANKENSTEIN

2006-09-11T00:00:00.000-04:00

51. SON OF FRANKENSTEIN
(1939)
Directed by Rowland V. Lee

Now here's a sequel that is definitely worth mentioning. "Son of Frankenstein" was released to a fright hungry public after a two year ban on horror movies (yes, shocking but true) and stands as a fitting climax to the great 1930's Universal cycle of such films. It's many assets include the marvelous set designs (consistent in quality with the two James Whale directed Frankenstein movies that came before) of gloomy dead trees, rolling fog and shadowy interiors. Karloff plays the monster for the last time opposite Bela Lugosi as the maniacal hunchback Ygor who still bears the gruesome neck scar from an unsuccessful hanging. Ygor befriends the monster for less than admirable reasons but their manipulative relationship is heart rending in it's way. Two outcasts bonding on the far side of the grave against the world that wants nothing to do with them. If only all buddy films were like this... Basil Rathbone plays the son of Dr. Frankenstein employed by Ygor to get the monster back to lumbering about scaring the shit out of people and he's solid but the show stopper is Lionel Atwill as the mutilated inspector who had his arm ripped out by the monster when he was a child. During the climax, just for old time's sake, the monster tears his arm (now a fake) out of the socket again. Karloff would continue to make some interesting movies through the 1940's and beyond but poor Bela, as all monster kids know, wasn't so lucky

52. THE CREATURE FROM THE BLACK LAGOON

2006-09-10T00:00:00.000-04:00

52. THE CREATURE FROM THE BLACK LAGOON
(1954)
Directed by Jack Arnold

Horror culture was alive and well in the 1950's. The advent of television hipped a new generation of disgruntled youngsters to the classic Universal monsters of the 1930's on boob tube horror shows hosted by the likes of Vampira, Zacherly and Ghoulardi. This inspired the first great magazine devoted to silver screen horrors, "Famous Monsters of Filmland" in 1958 and also dozens and dozens of monster related rock 'n roll tunes. But kids needed a new monster of their own and Universal managed to churn out another one with the internationally recognized "Creature From the Black Lagoon". Like the Universal monsters of old this creature could indeed end your life in a painful fashion but was essentially a sympathetic figure. Think about it. He'd been living in this peaceful lagoon minding his own business when in steams a ship of nosey scientists who discover his existence and try to capture him. On the ship is a beautiful woman and the creature, showing his romantic side, falls in love with her. Too far down the evolutionary scale to mount any sophisticated type of courting he does what lizard men will do and just carries her off. Folks have pointed out that this is really just the King Kong story with the gill man replacing the big ape but it's a tragic tale that bears repeating. Monsters are never lucky in love. Of course the creature suit, though innovative for it's time, is a wee bit dated these days, but I consider this the reigning king of the 50's creature features. The underwater scenes are top notch and must've been breathtaking on a Drive-In screen, especially in it's original 3-D. In true Hollywood fashion sequels were made but none are worth mentioning.

53. BLOOD AND ROSES

2006-09-09T00:00:00.000-04:00

53. BLOOD AND ROSES
(1960)
Directed by Roger Vadim

It troubles me to have to preface this entry with a disclaimer but that's just what I'm going to do. I saw this movie only once and it was several blurry years ago but it left a lasting impression on me and there was no way I could leave it off this list. When talking about vampire movies (which seems to happen often) I always have to bring it up. Sure I was far from sober during this single viewing but I am trusting that my memory hasn't betrayed me. Everything I've read about "Blood and Roses" since then leads me to believe that it really was as good as I recall. One thing is for certain: in the crowded realm of the vampire movie this one clearly stands out as unique. There are many flavors to bloodsucking cinema but movies that make a serious attempt to be poetic are hard to find. It's the first re-telling of the LeFanu story "Carmilla" that actually resembles the tale (pre-dating the rash of lesbian vampire movies I just wrote about that exploded about a decade later) and is probably the best thing that director Roger Vadim ever had a part in. Annette Vadim, his wife at the time, plays Carmilla and she has her eyes set on the irresistible ashen throat of Georgia Monteverdi (played by Elsa Martinelli). Vadim, for the record, was once married to Brigette Bardot and would later direct the charmingly atrocious "Barbarella" (1968) along with some forgettable exercises in soft porn.

54. THE ABOMINABLE DR. PHIBES

2006-09-08T00:00:00.000-04:00

54. THE ABOMINABLE DR. PHIBES
(1971)
Directed by Robert Fuest

By the time this movie was released in 1971 Vincent Price had already been long inducted into the monster hall of fame, a veteran of genre classics like "House of Wax" (1953), "The Fly" (1958), "House on Haunted Hill" (1959), the Roger Corman Poe cycle, "Witchfinder General" (1968) and many others. So folks had grown accustomed to seeing him in all types of sinister and tormented roles but his portrayal of Dr. Phibes is hands down the most wonderfully demented. Dr. Phibes has survived near death to emerge horribly scarred but intact and instead of finding some corny new appreciation for life he does what I would do by devoting himself to villainy and sadistic vengeance! Unable to speak in the conventional manner he communicates through an electronic device lodged in his neck and, as eccentric bonuses, wears ill-advised costumes and plays a mean pipe organ. Like any good mad doctor he has an assistant but instead of an unsightly hunchback we have the lovely Vulnavia (made all the more fetching by her easy compliance with the evil plans of Phibes). This was Vincent's 100th feature and was followed by an equally ludicrous sequel in 1972, "Dr. Phibes Rises Again". Sadly enough these two movies represented the last of his great work in horror and the landscape was soon to change with a dramatic shift to slasher movies that had little room for thespians with his elegance and charm. The line of consummate horror icons like Lon Chaney and Boris Karloff ended with Vincent Price and no one has risen to their stature since. That, my friends, is a goddamn shame.

55. VAMPYRES

2006-09-07T00:00:00.000-04:00

55. VAMPYRES
(1974)
Directed by Jose Roman Larraz

The time on our list has come to talk about lesbian vampire movies and the inspiration for most of these films is Sheridan LeFanu's archetypal 19th Century novella "Carmilla". Essential reading, in case you didn't know. The sexy undead predatory female who will turn you on, steal your women and suck you dry has massive appeal for reasons that are both too obvious and too involved to list here. Film scholars have published research on the matter so if you're curious then get thee to a library and read up. This interesting and lascivious sub-genre of horror movies had it's initial burst of popularity in the early 1970's due mostly to a successful trilogy of Hammer films, "The Vampire Lovers" (1970), "Lust for a Vampire" (1971) and "Twins of Evil" (1972). Jean Rollin was also making sexy bloodsucking movies in France and Jess Franco was doing the same in Spain (most famously with 1970's "Vampyros Lesbos") but I think the best, and sexiest, of them all was this latecomer, "Vampyres", orchestrated in some lost chilly October by an otherwise undistinguished director, Jose Ramon Larraz. The lovely living dead gals are played by Marianne Morris and model/centerfold Anulka. It's very erotic, very bloody and filmed on location at a stunning English manor. I'm getting hot under the collar just thinking about it. Better move on.

56. THE BLAIR WITCH PROJECT

2006-09-06T00:00:00.000-04:00

56. THE BLAIR WITCH PROJECT
(1999)
Directed by Daniel Myrick and Eduardo Sanchez

I have found that this super-hyped phenomenon of an indie flick is one of those love 'em or hate 'em movies and it's my humble opinion that those who hate "The Blair Witch Project" have been so polluted by bad modern horror big budget shit-fests that they can't appreciate an imaginative and effective creeper like this when it comes along. As a full blown horror fan I have suffered through countless formula driven and cliche ridden attempts at fright, always longing for something unique and singular to come down the pike. The genre needed this movie in a big way. Plus, maybe because of my Slavic blood, I'm a sucker for scary witch folk tales and creepy woodsy settings when autumn has rolled over the landscape, dropping dead leaves and infesting everything with a new spine tingly chill. "The Blair Witch Project" sure has that feel. Yeah, the hype was a bit much after awhile but it was a welcome deviation from the norm to have a zero budget horror flick generate a buzz that packed theatres nationwide. The only other independently produced horror movie that came close to causing such a stir was "Halloween" in the Fall of 1978. "Blair Witch" was a singular phenomenon for sure and one that I thoroughly enjoyed. No computer generated horseshit, just the power of suggestion, the strength of shadows and no survivors.

57. SHIVERS (aka THEY CAME FROM WITHIN)

2006-09-05T00:00:00.000-04:00

57. SHIVERS (aka THEY CAME FROM WITHIN)
(1976)
Directed by David Cronenberg

Cronenberg has had a long career of creating challenging and troubling films ("The Brood" (1979), "Scanners" (1981), "Dead Ringers" (1988), "Naked Lunch" (1991), etc.) and he continues to be one of the most interesting filmmakers around but my personal favorite dates back to the beginning of his body of work. "Shivers" was shot in his native Canada and involves a sexually transmitted disease which is spread by truly disgusting slimy black slugs that crawl into their host and proceed to turn their libido on full blast, promoting frenzied couplings and thus facilitating further infections which eventually leads to a state of frothing anarchy. All of this happens in an idealized shiny clean high rise community with all the comforts and conveniences one could hope for. This particular brand of intelligent cinematic repulsion that Cronenberg became a master of has been called biological horror and, as labels go, it works. The monster lurks inside and the body is primed for revolt. That's why I've always preferred "They Came From Within" as a title. The double barrel fears of having your body invaded by parasites, especially the visually loathsome variety in this film, and then spiraling into madness can still blast holes in an unsuspecting viewer. This would work rather well on a double billing with the much talked about "28 Days Later" (2003).

58. TWO THOUSAND MANIACS

2006-09-04T00:00:00.000-04:00

58. TWO THOUSAND MANIACS
(1964)
Directed by Herschell Gordon Lewis

Legendary B-movie director Herschell Gordon Lewis (aka "The Godfather of Gore") has said that this tale of Confederate retribution is the favorite of all of his cinematic crimes. I'm quite fond of it as well. Now, old H.G. never had much of a budget on any of his ventures but, in a series of around 8 movies made between 1963 and 1973, he sure did have a lot of fake blood and butcher shop animal parts. It all started with "Blood Feast" (1963) and reached dizzying heights of bad taste with "The Wizard of Gore" (1970) and "The Gore-Gore Girls" (1972). But number 58 on our list is our immediate concern and it's one hundred proof poorly acted redneck horror! Warning, if you haven't seen "Two Thousand Maniacs", I'm fixing to lay down a big spoiler. What you get in this movie is a little town called Pleasant Valley with it's own scary little bluegrass trio called the Pleasant Valley Boys, and they are celebrating a centennial whose festivities include murdering unsuspecting Yankees by axe chopping, some old fashioned drawn and quartered torso twisting, a bloody barrel roll and a bone crushing falling rock (in that order). "Such a strange little affair, it's almost like Halloween..."

59. CARRIE

2006-09-03T00:00:00.000-04:00

59. CARRIE
(1976)
Directed by Brian DePalma

Let's talk about the horror of high school. Anyone who was ugly, awkward, introverted, strange or shunned during those years most likely harbors little nostalgia for the experience. Surviving that gauntlet of assholes can certainly become a strong bonding point later in life when you find other social pariahs who had to weather the same tedious path, but it's no fun while it's happening. This is one of the reasons horror and adolescence make such complimentary partners. High school horror movies started with that cresting wave of juvenile delinquent films to infect movie screens across the country in the 1950's and the best of these tapped into the awkward trauma of those years with real panache. But it would take 20 years and the pen of a monster kid weaned on those lurid B-movies and gory EC Comics to create the paragon in teenage vengeance, "Carrie". The pen of course belonged to Stephen King and this was his first published novel. Directed by Brian DePalma and sporting a supporting cast that includes P.J. Soles, John Travolta and Nancy Allen, this was a big box office hit in ye olde Bicentennial year. A recent and rather clever addition to the high school horror canon is "Donnie Darko" (2001) but it really can't compare to Sissy Spacek having a telekinetic freak out covered in pig's blood.

60. DEAD ALIVE

2006-09-02T00:00:00.000-04:00

60. DEAD ALIVE
(1992)
Directed by Peter Jackson

Evil claymation monkeys, horny zombies doing the horizontal mambo, a massive Oedipal monstrosity busting through the roof, zombies being mowed down by a hoisted lawnmower resulting in copious sprays of viscera, and yes, a heartwarming romantic subplot- this sick puppy is a deliriously over the top landmark in horrors messiest manifestation, the splatter film. It's a juvenile gross-out that may be best enjoyed by the younger set with a hankering for something ridiculous and disgusting but I must admit that films like these have a way of putting me back in touch with my inner teenager. It makes me want to buy a stack of comic books, sniff glue and spray paint the red brick walls of a convent. While it may not drive you to delinquency it surely won't trouble you with any deep thoughts. It's just comic book gore and lots of it. Peter Jackson was also responsible for the super stoopid gross out "Meet the Feebles" but don't waste your time with that Muppet inspired misfire. "Dead Alive" is the one to see.

61. THE THRILL KILLERS

2006-09-01T00:00:00.000-04:00

61. THE THRILL KILLERS
(1964)
Directed by Ray Dennis Steckler

I was lucky enough to see this cinematic triumph, also known as "The Maniacs are Loose", on the big screen and ever since then it has retained a special enclave in my little black heart. It abounds with anti-social coolness. It's a story about three escaped homicidal lunatics (The Headchoppers Three!) who team up with a serial killer named Mad Dog Click played by the director himself (under the name Cash Flagg) and then proceed to terrorize some very unlucky folks in the Topanga Canyon. Steckler was the inventive mastermind behind a handful of underground classics in the 60's including "Rat Pfink a Boo Boo" (1966), "Wild Guitar"(1962) and "The Incredibly Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living and Became Mixed-Up Zombies" (1963) (the world's first monster musical!). "The Thrill Killers" is his best. Notable appearances include sexpot Liz Renay (fresh out of prison where she served hard time rather than rat out her gangster boyfriend) and Ron Haydock (editor of "Fantastic Monsters" magazine and rockabilly singer whose music can be enjoyed on a swank collection called "99 Chicks" brought to us by Norton Records). The original ads promise "Heads chopped off before your eyes" in "Hallucinogenic Hypno-Vision" and you will not be let down! Unlike anything you have ever seen before! Kill crazy psychopaths! Motel murders! Roadside diner horrors! See it or die a thousand deaths!

62. THE FEARLESS VAMPIRE KILLERS

2006-08-31T00:00:00.000-04:00

62. THE FEARLESS VAMPIRE KILLERS
(1967)
Directed by Roman Polanski

Legendary Polish genius and fugitive from justice Roman Polanski made this as a tribute to the series of vampire films released by Hammer that started with "Horror of Dracula" in 1958. The Hammer films are important and classic and they had a lot of red stuff and Christopher Lee and Peter Cushing and the directorial skills of Terence Fisher and, later, some snickering Ingrid Pitt action, but "The Fearless Vampire Killers" beats them all. Originally titled "Dance of the Vampires" it was released after Polanski's initial horror film "Repulsion" (1965) and a year before his horror triumph "Rosemary's Baby" (1968). The story follows two less than efficient vampire killers, one of them played by Roman himself, and has some very funny moments but, unlike many forgettable full blown spoofs of the undead, this is more of a horror film than a comedy, more of a fan's ode to bloodsuckers than a satire. The problem with many of those exalted Hammer flicks is that they become unintentionally silly in all their stately seriousness. What Polanski managed to do with his contribution was to craft a beautifully filmed homage that rises above his sources of inspiration with wit and snow and fangs and a memorable finale. On a final note, Sharon Tate, at the height of her beauty, appears in the role of vampire victim just a few years before those smelly hippies known as the Manson family ended her life.

63. THE PIT AND THE PENDULUM

2006-08-30T12:00:00.000-04:00

63. THE PIT AND THE PENDULUM
(1961)
Directed by Roger Corman

Roger Corman's Poe cycle consisted of seven films, beginning with "The Fall of the House of Usher" in 1960, continuing with "The Pit and the Pendulum"(1961),"The Premature Burial" (1961), "The Raven" (1963), "The Terror" (1963), and finally culminating in 1964 with the two that many horror fans regard as the best, "The Tomb of Ligeia" and "Masque of the Red Death". All of these have their merits but it's number two in the cycle that makes an appearance on this esteemed list, primarily because it offers horror fans the treat of seeing the reigning Prince of Horror, Vincent Price, alongside the rising Queen of Horror, Barbara Steele. Barbara had recently completed the Mario Bava directed "Black Sunday" and plays the role of an unfaithful and conniving spouse in "The Pit and the Pendulum" (a role that she would be cast in more than a few times in the following years). But Barbara is given very limited screen time and it's 'ol Vincent who steals the show. A sophisticated actor with that demented and somewhat queer voice, Vincent Price was a master at portraying a man touched by madness and spiraling into lunacy.

64. THE COMPANY OF WOLVES

2006-08-29T00:00:00.000-04:00

64. THE COMPANY OF WOLVES
(1984)
Directed by Neil Jordan

Angela Carter, a woman of great talent and imagination, passed into death back in 1992 but not before leaving us with some amazing books. The early novel "The Magic Toyshop" and the later novel "Nights at the Circus" are highly regarded but her little masterpiece is a collection of short stories called "The Bloody Chamber". Three of these stories ("The Werewolf", "The Company of Wolves" and "Wolf-Alice") are the basis for this movie collaboration with director Neil Jordan. At it's core is the old Little Red Riding Hood fable all dressed up in a new red cloak. Angela Carter enjoyed empowering the female characters of old fairy tales and in the process was able to infuse the familiar stories with new and often erotically charged meaning. I strongly suggest you create a space on your bookshelf for "The Bloody Chamber" but if you'd like to begin with a visual introduction to Angela's world then by all means watch this exceptional film which manages to capture some of the book's dark spirit. Neil Jordan would go on to direct other movies of interest, including the visually rich but mildly disappointing "Interview with a Vampire" (1994).

65. SALEM'S LOT

2006-08-28T00:00:00.000-04:00

65. SALEM'S LOT
(1979)
Directed by Tobe Hooper

Did horror fans in 1979 realize how lucky they were? Not only did they get Cronenberg's "The Brood" from Canada, Fulci's "Zombi 2" from Italy, Herzog's "Nosferatu, the Vampyre" from Germany and Ridley Scott's "Alien" from right here in the United States all on the big screen, they also got Tobe Hooper's adaptation of the Stephen King bloodsucking classic "Salem's Lot" on the goddamn television! Exploring the themes of vampirism as a plague and the insular small town as a trap, this is quite a creepy little tale. I saw it as a kid when it aired for the first time and Danny Glick scratchin' at the windowpane haunted me for years. I would actually torment my little sister and her friends with my imitation of the floating Glick boy in twilight backyard games until our parents had heard enough screaming for the day and called us in. In addition to those pleasant associations, "Salem's Lot" the novel was the first 'adult' novel I read in it's entirety as a youngster on a family camping trip to northern Michigan and I suppose my ongoing adoration certainly has some roots in nostalgia but this really is Stephen King at his best. Truly one of television's finest moments.

66. RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD

2006-08-27T00:00:00.000-04:00

66. RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD
(1985)
Directed by Dan O'Bannon

Where does one begin when singing the praises of this accomplished piece of cinematic kicks? Well, I guess you could start with the sick humor ("It's not weasels in the bags", "Send more paramedics" etc.) and then continue by mentioning that there's naked graveyard dancing, punks getting devoured by zombies and punks in turn wasting zombies (glorious 1980's punks, might I add, including the black cat with a Rick James mullet), and if you can get past the mostly cheeseball 80's soundtrack (songs by the Cramps and Roky Erickson being two big BIG exceptions) then what you have is a zombie movie that just can't lose. As a sequel to "Night of the Living Dead" this movie succeeds because it refuses to be serious, even when characters are moaning through the pains of rigor mortis on their way to zombiehood. It's pure high octane comic book entertainment (an approach that also worked well in another sequel with a daunting predecessor released the following year, "Texas Chainsaw Massacre, Part Two"). "Life is short and it's filled with stuff, so let me know, baby, when you've had enough..."

67. AN AMERICAN WEREWOLF IN LONDON

2006-08-26T00:00:00.000-04:00

67. AN AMERICAN WEREWOLF IN LONDON
(1981)
Directed by John Landis

I've always been fond of this movie because it succeeds with a tricky endeavor by walking the creaking plank between horror and humor without going overboard. The horror elements are truly horrific, especially the explicit transformation sequence and the nightmare of the ravenous Nazi werewolves, and the jokes, morbid and generally unobtrusive, are pretty goddamn funny. Let me say right here that even though this is one of only two werewolf movies on my list I have nothing against werewolves. It just seems that this hairy monster has yet to be given the grand cinematic treatment it deserves. "The Werewolf of London" (1935) "The Wolf Man" (1941) "I Was a Teenage Werewolf" (1957) and especially "The Howling" (1980) all have their moments, for sure, and recent takes on the old legend like the very impressive "Ginger Snaps" (2001) and the surprisingly good "Dog Soldiers" (2002) are encouraging and may gain lofty stature over time, but this hirsute shapeshifter has in most part been sadly underserved. I have a hunch that the greatest werewolf movie of them all is yet to be made but for now we can revisit "An American Werewolf in London" and that isn't so bad.

68. THE MOST DANGEROUS GAME

2006-08-25T00:00:00.000-04:00

68. THE MOST DANGEROUS GAME
(1932)
Directed by Ernest B. Schoedsack and Irving Pichel

One lesson a person learns quickly when taking a furtive look around at the history of horror films, from the masterful efforts to the sub-par crapola variety, is that the monster is ever present and the monster has many faces. More often than not the monster has a human face and such is the case in "The Most Dangerous Game". Based on the Richard Connell short story of the same name we meet the villain in his opulent castle digs on a remote island where he manages to lure unsuspecting ships to crash on the rocks. Those who survive their capsizing meet the villain (who has the appropriately villainous name of Count Zaroff) and become a part of his bloody pastime. He is a hunter who has bagged every dangerous animal he can think of and now gets his kicks hunting people, lopping off their heads for trophies. Heart fluttering eye candy is provided in the delicious form of Fay Wray who is enchanting even if, and especially when, she's under duress. Spooky swamps, strange menace, big suspense- this is an overlooked exotic trinket from horrors golden age.

69. HOUSE OF 1,000 CORPSES

2006-08-24T00:00:00.000-04:00

69. HOUSE OF 1,000 CORPSES
(2003)
Directed by Rob Zombie

It's fitting to begin the countdown with the most recently released movie on this list and, furthermore, with such a shameless tribute to screen horrors that came before. There's nothing new as far as the story is concerned but Mr. Zombie has crammed so many great visuals into this gaudy package that it's not easy to dismiss. "House of 1,000 Corpses" is a nasty little valentine to monster kids, a gift from one rabid horror fan to the rest of us. As I said before there's nothing really groundbreaking here but it's a cheap, rickety, and garish funhouse ride, crafted as a twisted and messy salute to an older breed of shock theatre by a director who is steeped in the stuff and who clearly takes his horror business seriously. Big bonus points are given for the Halloween setting and for steering clear of computer generated effects by doing gore the old fashioned way. The casting (Sid Haig, Karen Black, Bill Moselley) is also a treat for devoted mavens of the monstrous.

An Introduction

2006-08-23T00:00:00.000-04:00

(The following incarnation of "Johnny Refund's Dreadful 69" was originaly published in 2003 on the Mephisto Waltz website, and although a couple years out of date, and according to the author "in need of a massive overhaul," I still feel it has enough relavance to be worthwhile posting here) --- Your ever loving editor

I could blame it all on Sir Graves Ghastly. As an awkward and pale little boy I saw him rise out of his velvet lined coffin, heard his sinister laugh and felt a stirring of excitement deep inside that reverberates through me to this day. I never saw Sir Graves in person, only on the big bulky television in my parent's house, but when that coffin lid creaked open on Saturday afternoons I was planted against good advice just a few feet from the screen anxious to see what new horror classic my hero was going to dust off. Sir Graves was a fixture on Detroit television (Channel 2, WJBK) through the 1970's and into the early 1980's. He, like other horror show hosts in other cities, introduced brave children to the misty and menacing world of the old cobweb classics, wheeling out Dracula, Frankenstein's monster, the Mummy and the Werewolf in front of our fascinated eyes, finishing each treat by climbing back into his coffin and wishing us "Happy haunting!" before letting the lid drop for another seven days. Later I would discover horror in literature and horror in music but my introduction to the genre was movies. The following list is a document of my favorites as of the Halloween season, 2003. These are just favorites, just opinions, and what has been pointed out about the common element of opinions and assholes is true- everybody has one. So administer yourself that grain of salt right now. Monsters are coming and monsters are here. The ghosts have found the staircase and that's where they will drift. The Devil is shining up his pitchfork with a greasy rag and the sleep of reason is commencing. So, my dear, remove that batch of garlic that's hanging by your window and let's get down to business.